part timer’s guilt

Some weeks I feel I have somehow succeeded in walking the tightrope… retaining my ‘balance’ between my two worlds ~ my professional self and mama land.

While other weeks I feel consumed by one part of my life and worry that it affects the other. When in reality, I think I work very hard to ensure both keep ticking along as best as can be

At work I try to avoid being a bottleneck, and work extra hard to avoid this. I enjoy the professional challenges that come my way and pour a lot of mental energy into them {sometimes leaving little for the evenings at home}

But I am lucky that in my work ‘I make a difference’ and feel valued {for I am sure it would be much harder if this wasn’t the case!}

At home I try to ensure I slow down and enjoy the little moments. To play, to craft, to bake… and to just be with them.

So I stop and sit while they play… Smiling while I watch, joining in when I can’t resist *smile*

In this balancing act I find that if I stay present in the moment I am more productive, or connected to where I am and what that involves.

But at times my mind slips away to think about work when I am home, or to home when I am at work. So I write things down, or allow myself a moment, before diving back in.

And because I work my days all in a row, I have set up lots of memory cues to help me jump back in when the time comes.

However a lot can happen in a couple of days. So I have had to learn to let go a great deal more than before. And to maximise the input I can provide when I can.

But all in all, I still have part timer’s guilt